Resolutions.

It's that time of year so here goes.
-Walk more
-Ride my bike more.
-Read more.
-Be less anti-social.
-Eat better.
-Take some dance classes.
-Do yoga more.

A day off...

So I stole this idea from a friend....that being said...
A day off to me means:
-Sleeping in.
-Doing laundry.
-Reading.
-Lounging in bed.
-Movies.
-Not talking, if I'm not feeling it.
-Hanging with friends.
-Naked Beach Day (although it's been awhile.)
-Cleaning my room.
-A nap in the afternoon.
-Talking to family.
-Art time.

Blah.

I can't believe it has been over 2 weeks since my last post. I haven't felt inspired to write at all. The holidays have been rough for me. They always are anyway, since it reminds me of the two people I have lost in the recent years, but this year feels especially difficult. I don't know if it is because I am working 6 days a week, and putting in 10 hour days, but whatever it is, it has been rough. I have felt overwhelmingly anti-social, and exhausted, almost all of the time. I have attempted a conscious effort to pull myself out of the balck hole I find myself in, but to no avail. I hope that having 2 days off this week will help. We shall see.

Funk...

Today I lapsed into a funk.
I knew something was wrong when I was on the phone with my Dad. I found myself getting irritated with him, which almost never happens. See my Dad, he is...a joker. I always have good conversations with him, so I knew something was up.
I putzed around my room organizing, I got on the internet, I tried watching the boob tube.....nothing seemed to help.
I have these episodes every once in awhile. I feel bored, restless, antsy and incapable of making a decision as to what to do.
Finally as I have learned to do from previous experiences I decided I had to get out of the house. So I went to see a movie. But not just any movie, because not just any movie would cheer me up....it needed to be something dark and scary....so I got online to see what was playing, and lo and behold there was Stephen King's The Mist. Anyone who knows me knows I am a Stephen King fanatic. (I bet you didn't know he has a daughter with my name.) So this was perfect.
The movie was great, I was surprised actually, usually they butcher King's work when turning it into a movie. It helped break me out of my funk as well.
Which brings me to this question:
Why is it that fucked up, dark, scary ass movies.............................cheer me up?

Rain...........and Ziggy Marley!!

I feel refreshed, revived, alive. The Ziggy Marley show was just what I needed. I put my request in for the day off a month ago, as soon as I heard he was coming to Maui. I told myself, "I do not care how much it costs or if it rains. I do not care what work says, or if I have to go alone, I am going to this concert.
Well, it wasn't that expensive and it DID rain, (which actually made the concert infinitely better) and work gave me the night off, and I went with a bunch of friends.
It was amazing. I've been trying to tell friends that couldn't go, how great the concert was. I have yet to find the words to express my joy. Ziggy was amazing, fantastic, superb, I could keep going....To use the words of a friend, "It was Epic!"
As I stood there dancing in the rain, to..............ZIGGY MARLEY.............. surrounded by friends, I felt.....alive and full of joy. I thought to myself, "Is this really my life? Do I really live like this? On a beautiful island, with amazing people, where I get to experience these kind of things?"
Well this is my life......and I love EVERY SINGLE MINUTE OF IT!

Stormy Weather.....

It has been an interesting and eye-opening week on the island of Maui. You see I live in Kihei, Maui, where it almost never rains. In fact the weather hardly ever changes. So this past week we had our first big Kona Storm in years. It rained for a week. And I'm not talking about the normal Kihei rains either. This was not the normal "Kihei Mist" that we get. This was a downpour for a week. This was, "Raining cats and dogs." This was monsoon weather. The roads were flooded, cars were floating in the streets, trees were knocked over. I saw one tree that crushed a car on South Kihei Road. We lost power for 2 days. Which may not seem that bad, but on an island it can be rough. Everything was closed. I was lucky to find food. I lived on pre-made sandwiches for 2 days. (Not my ideal diet.) Communication with my workplace was difficult to say the least. No one was answering their phones, reception was bad, it was a logistical nightmare.
The entire thing made me wonder, what is going to happen if we got a real storm, and actual hurricane?This one was bad, but nowhere near what a hurricane could do. What would we do then???

Desiderata

Desiderata Go placidly amid the noise and haste,and remember what peace there may be in silence.As far as possible without surrenderbe on good terms with all persons.Speak your truth quietly and clearly;and listen to others,even the dull and the ignorant;they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons,they are vexations to the spirit.If you compare yourself with others,you may become vain and bitter;for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.Exercise caution in your business affairs;for the world is full of trickery.But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;many persons strive for high ideals;and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself.Especially, do not feign affection.Neither be cynical about love;for in the face of all aridity and disenchantmentit is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years,gracefully surrendering the things of youth.Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.Beyond a wholesome discipline,be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe,no less than the trees and the stars;you have a right to be here.And whether or not it is clear to you,no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,whatever you conceive Him to be,and whatever your labors and aspirations,in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,it is still a beautiful world.Be cheerful.Strive to be happy.
Max Ehrmann, Desiderata, Copyright 1952.

Thoughts...

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.
THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.
FOUR. When you say, 'I love you,' mean it.
FIVE. When you say, 'I'm sorry,' look the person in the eye.
SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.
EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.
NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.
TEN.. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.
ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.
TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.
THIRTEEN! .. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, 'Why do you want to know?'
FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
FIFTEEN. Say 'bless you' when you hear someone sneeze.
SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.
EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.
TWENTY- ONE. Spend some time alone.

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart. Do not keep this message.
Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your girlfriends.
--- Laurie Kuslansky

Vodka, Orange Juice, and Guys...

So there's this guy, we won't mention his name...who drives me crazy. We've been hanging out for while now and I am surprisingly into him. It started as a sexual attraction, but after spending some time with him I realized I actually like the guy. But it is complicated.....we work together. It is also frustrating because I am more available to him, than he is to me. I never thought I would be that girl who hangs out with a guy on his terms, usually it's on my terms. Usually I'm pretty fiercely independent and don't make myself that available to guys, but this guy has made me a little unhinged. I don't know why. I need to step outside the bubble and look at this situation from a new vantage point, because things can not keep going the way they are.

New blog...

First let me say that it has been awhile since I have written a blog. My old one got deleted and I was unmotivated to start another until recently. It may take awhile to get into the groove.
That being said....here goes nothing...